When endless reminders started pouring in reminding me about my commitment to write something for Fried Eye, I shook off the cobwebs of my mind and replied back meekly to the editor as “ok ,but what do I write about?” The reply came back in two words-Perfect Date. Well that acted as a kind of a catalyst and all the wheels, nut and bolts of my brains started up as if on cue trying to make up for those months of absence. Now FE has started this category called How To series and in a sudden brainstorm, I decided to write on How To Plan for The Perfect Date. The FE people were ok with it and I decided to go ahead with full vigor because though I am hopeless in many other matters, this is one thing I am highly qualified and experienced in. (or else how do I still explain my Miss and not Mrs status) Oh yes , this is something I totally agree with the Wise Bachelor my nemesis, as you really can’t argue with some universal truths and one of them is -Marriage Kills The Romance up to some extent. But why am I rambling? I know you all are getting impatient to get started. So then, I will try to keep the pointers as unisexual as possible but at places which need elaboration I will separate out the genders
Alright, if you are still with me up to this point and plan to continue reading then you are halfway done because as they say it’s the thought that counts. No matter how your date ends up as, one thing is sure that you can rest assured that your intentions were sincere and you tried your best.
Now that you have made up your mind to make the day/evening special (my recommendation is evening; it opens a whole lot of possibilities) for your loved one, lets get on to the technicalities and the first thing you have to decide on is Venue.
Ideally a beach, seashore or the mountainside is the best for a lovey dovey romantic evenings, but if those are way beyond your means both financially and geographically lets explore other possibilities
One is a long drive with a picnic basket. The car or the bike offers you boundless freedom of choice and also the coveted privacy and intimacy. You can just drive on aimlessly through the highway with the music in the back ground, wind on your face, holding hands wishing if only you could go on and on and on… A little bit of rain will enhance the atmosphere further more. You can listen to your love speaking endlessly about little things which might seem like music to your ears or as an alternative, let the silence speak those words which you wanted to. Your glance and smile will tell him/her everything you wanted to.
If car or bike too is beyond your reach (which is quite understandable with the rising petrol prices ) you can go for the terrace of your building if it is a high rise and if the other occupants don’t raise too many awkward questions. Remember Imran Hashmi and Mallika Sherawat in Murder and again Imran Hashmi and Kangna in Gangster? The heights provide you with a sense of being on cloud nine and the top of the world feeling add to it the breeze , gives a sense of exhilarating freedom.
As I said earlier terrace can be a difficult option with nosey neighbors and in such case the best option would be to entertain him/her at your place or at your friend’s bachelor pad if your own place isn’t possible. (but for that either you have to have a very loyal friend or an opportunistic one to extract a fee but I am sure either ways you can manage it)
Then of course there are the regular options like the discotheque, movie hall, water park if you have no issues of sharing your private moments with hundred other people but of course regular is not special. And if it aint special then it isn’t perfect.
Now that you have fixed the venue next would be the ambience.
If you were so resourceful as to manage the beach or mountainside then I am sure everything is possible for you. Come on, go ahead, set a table, bring out the aromatic candles, the mattress , flowers, spread some satin sheets, put some cushions (no balloons please) bring out the crystal glasses, the crockery everything or at least similar to them , set them beautifully. Visual stimulation is as necessary as your sincere intentions to make everything perfect. This can be possible even at the terrace or your own place or the bachelor’s pad. You don’t even need bulky furniture either. If there are no proper dining tables then you can always go for one low table or a mat near your mattress arrangement and dine in sheer luxury like an Arab Sheikh. Just keep in mind that candles sometimes attract insects and can be a problem if you are in the open air. At such cases just set the candles or lighting a bit far off in the back ground.
Second thing that you have to keep in mind is the color of your spreads and sheets. I mean sometimes girls do tend to go over board with pink and guys with their fixation for white and blue. Why don’t you go for bold ones like Red or in bold black and white prints? It gives an impression of power and passion. Romance is fine but intensity? We can’t ignore the need for intensity, can we? As for flowers you can go for a single rose in a sleek vase or a bouquet of roses; no other options work better.
As for those who are in their cars, you don’t actually need an ambience. Nature does that for you. Just ensure some great music to go along with it.
But be careful of one thing- There shouldn’t be any stench in the atmosphere- no lingering cigarette smoke, no smell of unwashed sweaty clothes. The room or the air must be clean and dry .
That brings to music.
Music is an integral part of romance as can be seen by Bollywood numbers and even other wise. The combination of verses along with soulful melody can turn the hardest of heart into mush. Hence be very careful if you want to impress your love. It can make your date or break it either if one wrong step is taken. Music is also a great subject for bonding. Unless and until you both are literally soul mates you can’t be callous in your selections. It’s safe to play his/ her choices if you know it, but the best option and one that also forwards your purpose of the whole thing is to go for some soft numbers which have words that you would like to say to him/her and convey your feelings. (But again as I said don’t overdo the mush and no cheap music). Like there was this date of mine, who put on the song, “You are always a woman to me” by Billy Joel the moment I entered into the date area, looking deep into my eyes. Till date I haven’t been able to forget him.
To play safe you can go for the golden oldies- Sinatra, even Sir Elton John or even Rafi, Kishore, Lata and Talat Mehmood. You can go for ghazals or if you want to play too-too safe then you can go for instrumentals. But the usb/cd compilation should be ready on play mode without you trying to grope for the right CD among your piles of collections. Same goes for the music in the car. There are some great Car- romantic numbers from Bollywood like Tum Jo mil gaye ho from Hanste Zakhm still gives me the shivers. Or the cute one by Kishore Kumar- churi yeh nahin ye mera , from the DevAnand starrer Gambler. However if you want a vibrant fun evening, after a couple of soft ones, you can proceed on to the popular numbers and dance and laugh away the evening in each others company. Romance isn’t always about mush. Laughing and enjoying like a kid in each others company is also another variant of romance.
Fun! yes fun brings me to the the next technicality – activity.
Some of you maybe comfortable with whispering sweet nothings to your loved ones or sharing your innermost heartfelt secrets and feelings, talking the night away beneath the starry sky but what about the others who are shy or not much into talking? Well you can enjoy a flick together. Action movies, chick flick, high voltage emotional dramas are to be avoided unless and until you both have the same tastes. However for the bold ones I would like to suggest that horror movies (not much scary ones) are fine to get you both cosy together. You can go for rom coms but mind you not much mush again. Ask your friends for opinion or there is IMDB the God of the movie databases. My favorite till date are Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikander, Roman holiday and Ghost.
But again if movie is too constraining and you would like some fun outdoors instead, then yes, you can go for a drive after dinner, or a walk together .If you can strum a guitar how about belting out some tunes for him/her or crooning some numbers in a karaoke or even just like that? Games? Well diplomatically unsafe. Strict no-no are facebooking or net surfing. Don’t even think of it when you are with her/him. If salsa or jazz is your thing or even anything that is close to them, you can lead him/her for a dance together. Trust me, after that you won’t be remembering any other activity.
Now let’s proceed on to food which is an integral part of any date, be it a business luncheon or a cocktail party or The Perfect Date.
If you can cook even little bit decently, then just prepare a simple meal for him/ her. Your love will be impressed unless you have burnt it of course. Cuts a lot of extra charges and even I for that matter, any day would love to cook a grand meal for my man.. Other wise you can order a take away or there is the savior called Pizza and Pasta or even Chinese. If you are non vegetarian, then go for boneless variety. I mean chewing and tearing at a bone gives a very disgusting picture. Try hard for the food to be non messy. You wouldn’t like it if your food makes you or your date messy and unsavory later on. Will you? Nor would you like it if you end up all bloated up with a heavy meal or even scowl throughout in starvation. So the amount should be just right and perfect.
Food, music, ambience and venue have been cleared up I guess, but we have not yet dealt with the most important one. A gift! Of course the date itself is a gift but still a memento is the best way to keep it registered as a memory. If sky is the limit for you then I guess you wouldn’t be needing any advice from me, but for the less fortunate ones, I would suggest roses, perfumes (not deodorants) Swiss chocolates, sterling silver pendants, a dress ( not that pricey on your pocket) lingerie- if you are in that level with her (to the guys). For the girls- safest would be Perfumes, CDs . Gadgets and if a book lover, than books.
Well that almost takes care of everything. Wait! There is another thing- Your attire. Well wear which compliments you the best and something that is comfortable. As for me I would love to wear a flowy long skirt with an off shoulder fitted top and what would I like him to wear? Loose six pocket trousers with a boat necked loose full sleeved tee shirt, but again this is your date, not mine.
So I hope I could help you plan your date to an extent. You can add your own original signature style to the plans to make your perfect, unique date. Again these ideas are not hard or fast rules on dating. It’s his/ her happiness that should matter in the choices. If your date would love to be in a rock concert or a stadium watching cricket, then make his/her day. Grant it to him/her. At the end of the day when you will see his/her smile contentedly, it will make all the troubles that you had undergone, worth everything. In the end I would like to just tell you one last thing. Ahem! Irrespective of everything,. practice safe sex and secondly respect each other’s private space and learn to hear a no. Got it? Okk Then. Have a nice time and my best very best wishes. Until next time., Hasta La vista !
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